Sagittarius 9° (December 1)

I’d like to think I’ll be getting things accomplished today but I’m still feeling so poorly. Still, I will soldier on, stay up in my office, and get done what I can. At times my mind swirls with ideas but it will happen when I’m washing dishes or vacuuming the house or something. Never when I’m seated in front of this screen typing away. There are still window screens to remove and I will get to that today as well. I also have to write to the Hotel Florato see what they have to say in regard to that last week in March. I think that shall be the best time to go in the end because we can truly travel light and leave everything at Dom and Nan’s (perhaps even at their office). I suspect we will hear back from them soon. I am looking forward to seeing the finances thus far of that particular buisness. Playing my cards right, I can come to understand myself and my own needs in the next four months. I know this sounds like quite a sharp turn from what I might have said previously but the fact is that I am writing different sentences on different days, once again, over the course of several entries. I have become so trapped feeling in so many various aspects of my life in which my relationship to bridges is just a part that I now must get underneath it all and attempt to return to some semblance of peace and self-understanding. I will devote myself to the care of one other individual as my one sacrifice in this world which can be enough. Otherwise I must be free to go inward. I must continue this journey. I am so aggravated right now you have no idea. As I’m writing this I am again interrupted by a circular conversation in which I want no part. So much hot air being blown around talking about how busy one is and how there isn’t enough time. It is such a ridiculous illusion and one in which I’ve had a part, admittedly. I just need to wake the fuck up right now and move forward on what is truly important. I have been kicked to the curb so many times over the course of the last decade I am no longer vulnerable. Anyway I have not much time for this sort of thing. I must prepare for Tuesday’s meeting:

So, with all we are doing these days, it was decided that I should lead on this. I first want to begin by saying that there are two parallel lines I’m exploring in preparation this. One is with A., who is the designer for our company, who has expressed interest in doing this and has also begun the process of sussing out for us what it might entail to produce this collection. Basically I have asked her as many questions as I could think of in envisioning the entirety of this process, and she has gone away to do some research and development on that score. But the bottom line is that this is something she can do. She would really be overseeing it. And it would entail making things in Turkey and so forth. Obviously, besides the logistics of the project I have asked her to suss out pricing from soup to nuts. Unlike our existing collaboration on the tee shirts, where Tim-Scapes is footing the bill and putting out initial costs, etc, it would be our business that would be spearheading the jewelry collaboration. Which brings me to the other parallel line for doing this project which is putting together some kind of structure between Starsky + Cox and your company because, again, we would be working opposite from the way we’ve been working. And in putting together an agreement, which we will ultimately do, which Marilyn will wave a wand over, we have to sort out that side of things, the collaborative side. Ideally, as you may have already discussed with S., we would have one agreement which would encompass everything. The agreement we have now is overly complicated as it is based on a licensing agreemeent. Marilyn thinks we need a simple two-page letter of agreement.

One simple agreement should detail the bi-directional nature of the arrangement: how for tee-shirts and perhaps other products under your purview, things would operate pretty much the way they have operated—I know you have already shifted to a 50/50 way of thinking if not operating; it would simply also state and detail that when it came to the jewelry line and perhaps other things down the road, it would operate in the opposite fashion, with our company leading and handing out percentages. It is possible we might need two separate agreements in the end—that it might be too tricky to put this all in one document—then again, Marilyn seems to feel that it could work under one comprehensive document. At least that is my understanding. But there is stuff to tackle even before we get there.

First, the model for the jewelry, even though we would be selling direct to consumer, would be that of a cost to wholesale to retail formula—that we would be “buying” the jewelry from ourselves to sell in our shops, taking both markups for ourselves. This would allow us to retail to other shops as well should a Nordstrom or that type of store want to buy for many doors. The tee-shirts, as they exist now, are not manufactured on that model. The wholesale price is in effect the retail price which prohibits us from offering them anwhere else but in your shop and online direct from us. With the jewelry we would need to sell through all money we first layout before we got to a 50-50 split, meaning the split is on net not gross. This is really the way we imagined the tee-shirts would have operated too but my suspicion is that you didn’t actually wait until you had been paid back your initial outlay before you began offering the 60/40 and now 50/50 split. So that too will need to be addressed before we sign a new deal. So my first question to you is: Has Tim-Scapes paid itself back for the money it originally put out? By rights this should come off the top of the gross. So really my question is: Each tee shirt sold first pays back its own individual production cost and then we go to split. With the jewelry we will be looking at making back all the production.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Sagittarius 8° (November 30)

We will get in the car super early today and head back to the Cape with me in the passenger seat. There will be no traffic. And we arrive back in time for S. to go to a class; and though I feel just horrible, I will nonetheless use the time to completely unpack and start to get my head around the coming week and final month here before we take off. Things needing doing include writing to Jim and letting him know we are away. He has been writing me daily about the deck so I will let him dangle a little longer before  voicing our plans. There is a call into S.’s derm otherwise I have to find someone this week. We have a back up plan for getting to Aberfeldy now in case the LLBs fall out. It seems we will switch plans and stay in the UK until we head to Paris. Not sure this is the smartest thing in the end but it could be the simplest. It is a matter of booking the right place. I will spend the better part of a morning reaching out to all my friends in London to inquire about potential places to stay. I will beef up my Paris profile, too, in the process. Everything is feeling just a little bit impossible. The plan is to have breakfast for dinner—for lunch, we had leftover vegetable soup that I made on Wednesday. But by the time evening rolls around we change that plan and I am pan roasting cauliflower in my cast iron skillet, to which I will add sauteed onion and anchovy and parsley and chicken stock, as a topping sauce for rice pasta. We plan on watching some serious films and yet we never get there. Instead we alight on the show Back to Life which I sort of love-hated.

There is this mandate for me to say more than this. It is like pulling teeth. I really don’t know where to begin. I feel as though I will disappoint myself in the coming weeks, once again. I have unrealistic expectations. I do do the same things over and over and think I’ll be spared the same results. It is definitely something I do. I have to make a sharp turn and stay off every kind of carb for the next nine days. As such I might have a ghost of a chance to shed a little before these upcoming parties. I will dust off the top hat I have sitting in the closet—a gift from a troll of a character with a nearby business. Really he’s just a crotchety thief of a pothead (and I think drug dealer too). One of the nasty sheep that find their way into one fold or other here on the tip of olde Cape Cod. Salonpas. There I said it. Been stuck in my brain all day. Had to get it out. Phew. I forwarded the information about the Orphans show on to Bill Mumy. I didn’t get any response. I must be resolved. I have begun perusing the people I need to approach. I sent out a whole bunch of FB pleas for people to give to the festival at the last of the year. Not a single response. I will do the same by email but I dare say it might be ineffectual. I could make an event of it I suppose but it just seems such a waste of time. I think I’m better off focusing on what I might achieve on larger, more scalable level. But first I must continue to invest in myself. And to that end I must look on the bright side or I’ll never move the spoon, so to speak. I have just a few weeks left on this rock and I’ve got to make the best of it. I look at my hands and they look weird and swollen like my father’s and it repulses me. I wonder if they will ever be slender again. Such a silly, selfish thought, perhaps.

I remember the feeling of anonymity growing up and how wonderful it was. That was the beauty of living in the 1970s. You could drive a truck through space and time that is how vast it felt. I could, as a kid, summers, at the Jersey Shore, walk out the door on any given weekday morning, the early warmth and floral smells pervading my being, the grainy cement of the sidewalk tickling my soles; and I could head off in any direction feeling every grain of my being. I suppose the answer is always meditation. I think that (and yoga) is the only answer to everything. I believe I have to stop and prioritize this. I have the resources to make this a part of my daily life. I can even go twice a day if I so choose. That’s what people who do yoga study do. Why should I not do the same. I see no reason to avoid the obvious. We have to find ways, nowadays, to recapture the natural spirit of how things should be. I am not contributing anything to the world writing this Blague as of late. I can tell I am creatively dry by the nature of this work. It’s okay so long as this dry spell gives rise to something better. It cannot all be fertile output all the time. We have to go through these spells. I think of all the transmutations of this endeavor. There have been so many incarnations. In the first year it was all about following the Sabian symbols; then it became a platform for various other creative and academic ideas. It also served as a kind of psychological exercise. There have been moments of Dada insanity. I do wish to go to Venice but I think maybe the winter is the only time to go after all. I’m going to champion that instinct. I will write to them today for sure. At the core I will get down to absolute basics. I will completely batten down the hatches in my office and begin to catalogue my books in librarian fashion. I will be more brutal in my editing of clothing from my wardrobe. These things will happen in the coming days as I plan my proverbial exit.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Sagittarius 7° (November 29)

So I don’t know what to tell you. It is the same and different all at once. I look back, I reflect. I think I could have done something differently; but nothing ever really changes and people build there little tree houses or whatever they do and they manage to squeak by, not really working, somehow always ending up surfacing, living off renting out the detritus of their existence. I have nothing more to give. Today is the day that I put it all on the line. I am bedridden, sick as a dog. S. will go out to get nails done while I lie there going in and out of sleep. She will return with medicaments naturale. I’ve succombed to sinus pain, cough, sore throat and fever. Oh well. I never get sick so I’m not really that concerned about it to be honest. I am trying to find something to watch on this weird, ancient television. With all the resources around here they don’t update anything. It’s just the way it is. Priorities. No judgments. They will all be going into town today to see the nutcracker. I will attempt to have some semblance of a life. I will try to work. It won’t work.  I am readying myself for this last three weeks at home. Really that is all it will be, I need to contact Jim about stuff. I want to get a haircut and get all my deliveries in. I want to find something nice to wear. I hope the thrift shops will be open this week. The one thing is I am going to prioritize some exercise, wardrobe, grooming and all such things as often get left in the dust. Weird how all the people I have fallings out with begin to overlap. It does very much feel like I’ve cut myself off from pretty much everyone. Or they from me perhaps. There is no use crying over spilled milquetoast. I have enough on my plate to keep my busy and happy in the process. Nobody will give a rat’s ass about most of the people shouting for praise.

Honestly I don’t know what you people want. I wish I had a clue as to what level of attention you think you deserve and why it is you desire it. I am all but gone from social media. I do not promote this Blague. I don’t want anything from anyone. “I want what I have.”—Starsky + Cox. I cannot understand all the greed. Not for money but for attention. How desperate have we become as a people. I don’t care what you think about the play you’re seeing or the food you’re eating. I have become so jaded and cynical and sad. I can’t explain why it is there is such a dearth of joy and giving in the world. I only know that in order to change it we need to make stronger, bolder moves. I can no longer live in fear. I don’t live in fear in fact. I live in a bit of horror if anything. Horror at the world. Horror at the prices of being alive. Horror at the lack of compassion one for another. Since when, I wonder, is someone like Parker “pals” with those creepy orphan people? When in hell would folks like Justin Elizabeth and Dolly overlap. How can it be that this world is not just some hologram of my own nightmares? The grifters of the world are the most obvious and disastrous and strange. I have nothing to do but be healthy and happy. I don’t know why everyone else out there is complaining so much as they dangle tidbits meant to make everyone else on the planet feel less than. I have taken myself completely out of all of that nonesense. I really have to give myself nothing but half an hour a day to get down my thoughts and feelings about all or any of this. I long to travel more and to make my little journeys.

The truth is that I will only ever get through a portion of what I need to accomplish today which is actually absolutely fine. I cannot overachieve anymore. I do need to get myself into some sort of shape so that I can feel my natural confidence soar. I don’t mean physically or even emotionally, but definitely spiritually. That is the only manner of being that truly matters in any case. I am prety delirious lying here all day. They will go from the ballet to Myers + Chang and I will ask for some hot and sour soup and some fried rice and I will eat it rather late and then fall asleep after watching all but the last Chernobyl. I’m running out of things to watch in the evening. I should be reading. I am only here for a very short time. And then I have to float around with no real place to stay; and then I must make my way to the airport. But that is not for another three weeks, in which span of time I will go to New York and be back in Boston a couple of times. It should all be good. I know there is much magic in all of this. I cannot believe how long it’s been since I’ve seen certian friends. I have such a sense of abandonment it’s not real. seriously i cannot emotionally handle it.

how can that be? how can I be so affected by lawn decor

i think people are extra honking as they go by

or I’m imagining it. in any case lawn decor should not cause me to disassociate from myself (is that the term?)

I have to write this:

HELP TO MAKE THE SEASON BRIGHT (AND GLOW-Y)

In the spirit of non-profits holding out their begging bowls, last ditch, in December, the Afterglow Festival comes to you on bended knee for help in making our own year ends meet:

As we enter year ten, we continue to preserve Provincetown’s legacy as the birth place of the modern American stage and as an incubator for progressive theater and live performance.

We champion emerging and experimenting artists, providing them all means necessary to come perform here, enriching Provincetown’s culture while honoring its theatrical birthright.

Beginning 2020, the Afterglow Festival will offer students and seniors complimentary entry to all our shows—it’s like townie night every night—along with educational talks and programs.

And so, for every tax-deductive Sparkler donation of $100 you make we will gift you a 2020 Haute Astrology by Starsky + Cox e-book of your choice as a thanks for your generosity.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Sagittarius 6° (November 28)

I think I’m feeling better but I will be so wrong about that. It was a fine morning and I’ve been vigilant about my new fasting routine. And my hope will be not to eat everything in sight today. I am quite coldy I realize as the morning goes on. I’m not in supercreative mode and ready to let things go. We ended up doing a little shopping last evening so we won’t arrive empty handed. The roads were completely clear driving up to see the in-laws. There is meant to be no drama, that is to say no cooking, and we have a noon reservation for dinner which is fine by me since I’ve been waking every day by around four. I want to continue on this path as I’ll be on European time by when we arrive there. I won’t say it’s not a struggle but the truth of the matter is that I need to get into the hardware of my being at this point. I won’t bore you with the astrology of that. Let’s just say I’m looking to get back to basics. I can’t even watch our own so-called liberal news anymore because it isn’t the news. News is reporting on things happening around the world and giving us more of a range of what is going on overall. I’m not even sure why it is I look at real estate. I am living a dream of some sort. I know this is all very random. It’s not that I’m intending it to be, it’s just where my brain is right now.

So we get there pretty much in time to bring our bags and have a little chat. There is ironic, apologetic boasting of what “snacks” will be later, which were supposed to be minimal but are being promoted as much more. We head to the restaurant. It’s weird to eat this early and I probably shouldn’t be having wine with a cold but caution is thrown to the wind. Most everyone has turkey. J. has salmon, S. filet mignon and I go for lamb chops. I dreamed of the blue-cheese wedge salad and so I start with that. And I get a hazelnut torte of sorts for dessert. It’s all quite quick. Millenials make the worst generation of servers ever to walk the planet. I’m feeling quite coldy now and return back to the house where I fall and remain asleep for two hours. Awakening, everybody is playing cards. There is food in the fridge but nobody wants to eat. I am apparently the only hungry one. The promise of making pretzels and dipping them in a cheddar sauce has gone by the wayside. I eat Dorritos and clam dip and a piece of pumpkin pie and have a half a glass of Chinon and I’m pretty well finished for the night. I don’t know what I’m thinking. I’m just feeling bloody awful. I can sense something seething and bubbling up to the surface.

I might be officially over everything including major aspects of self. I feel like making sacrifices. I feel like soaking up some of the excess, and sucking up all my so-called defeats. I’m also tired of trying to get blood from stones and letting everybody else, but myself, off the hook. I’m really not that interested or impressed by anybody who isn’t in my immediate sphere of friendship. I have had my eyes pretty much opened in 2019; and I’ve made a slew of mistakes, for sure. But I’m really ready to start letting go; and I’m hungry for new experiences, that I can tell you. I’m never really that happy on a holiday. Everyone in my family is dead, you see. And I’m not a huge priority but for maybe one or two people on this planet. That’s just the way it is. Orphaned and non-procreative and I don’t really have many friends. The ones I do have a very good ones; but we are not a very cozy lot, rather, we are, shall we say, non-co-dependent (which is often a euphemism for bloodless). I see people all around me clustered into clans that bordero n the cultish. Especially on Cape Cod and specifically in Provincetown. I suppose it is the same with the downtown New York City crowd. It’s fine. But I’m something of a pariah there, too, sometimes I feel. But that too is okay. Better than okay. That’s kind of where I’m going here:

I’m feeling driven forward, once again, in my life. This illusion of belonging on a grand scale to people, friends now synonomous with followers, in a world where everyone is bucking for position in some phantom pantheon. It’s preposterous. I think that might have been the message of the appearance of those Amish people to me at Penn Station. I know I have the wrong structure in that previous sentence but I am not looking back even in little ways like that. I have that adventurous feeling once again. That spirit of wanting to see the world. I literally have everything I need on my back. I travel with my livelihood and I should be happy to travel light. I am going to continue to loosen my load whilst filling my coffers. I want everyone to be happy and free, myself foremost. I want S. to be the happiest of all.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Sagittarius 5° (November 27)

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving on which there is a war, apparently. This bozo has got to go. I truly don’t understand why it is we are so complacent. We must get on our feet, all of us, and take back the dignity of this democracy. Less time posting about the latest article written about you and more time focused on fueling the reconstruction. I’m down some lbs and have a fortnight next goal. I’m not going to eat hardly anything this holiday season—I can take one year off from clam dip, for starters. I do believe this intermittent fasting could be lasting. I don’t mind the way I feel. And for me, since I eat dinner so early and go to bed quite early as well, there really isn’t much waiting in the morning. And it is my opportunity to hydrate like mad. I have a list a mile long today and I client in under two hours. I have the next forty or so minutes at home alone so I am taking the opportunity to put up this Blague entry but also to get back into self-pep-talk mode. I was quite ill in the night but (as mentioned in my previous post) I am fortunate that colds and the like move quickly through me. I am getting some older person symptoms now which is just the way it goes; and though they cannot be eradicated they can be kept in check with a good yoga practice of this I am certain. I will figure all that out in the coming week or so. There is no reason to drive myself crazy. I just need to start. And I have low-stakes ability to do just that. S. has decided she’s not returning to the practice until Paris but that would be kind of risky for me I think. I have to get more under my belt than just fat. I will try to get into town early on Friday if folks aren’t driving in until later. There is an morning train that would get me in by 9 and then I could stroll through Fanueil Hall, something I haven’t done in years, and Government Center and then on to the South End.

I also do have the ability to purchase the rainboots I want online. And I could get a second pair of the suede ones I love. I have my deck sneakers I can wear for sure. I will likely pack them for my next trip on the boat. I don’t really need to take them now. I do need to get rid of a lot of my clothing however and I am gearing up to do just that. I have four weeks to rid myself of enough dreaded weight that I don’t have to go on a ridiculous shopping spree but can instead take with me things I already have in my possession. I have had many a trip where I have eaten my way through Europe and the U.K. and I just am not going to spend/waste money on that sort of thing this year. There is very little point in doing so. Would that this day would end with some information from our agent. It won’t me thinks. Today was a weird but very productive day. We had two clients on the docket and one got knocked off and the other one seemed way too busy to make it work. All is as it should be. We went down our collective to-do list like we’ve never truly done before and a lot got accomplished. I’m not fixing this car, I’ve decided. I will try to get it fixed next week and if it doesn’t happen I’m going to contact Lacey and see if we can get it done in the spring. Meanwhile I’ve been shopping around for a Mercedes wagon, vintage of course. I looked up Missy Crowe and John and I think they still exist in this area. It would be weird and wonderful to see them.

These are notes that have been on my desk for some time. Ready?: Monday meeting bring ten possible posts. Social media S+C and PR Consultancy booking Paris appoingments. Should I do a press release? Make this a news item? I think I might. Also can I feed half social media ideas to make it easier? Someone said they were five years an architect; then pattern making. I remember my question was: are the clothes architectural. Oh I know what this is about ironically. These are notes from a session with someone I was supposed to speak to today. How funny. S. and I both have Lilith in Scorpio. There is the Asteroid version  about rage, resentment and sexual manipulation. Lilith is Impressionable and objective; the Moon is subjective. We spoke to that NBC journalist she was into asrology but hadn’t read our book(s)? What’s up with that. She had an affinity for Lilith. I asked if she was an Aries (to which we assign the Lilith archetype. And she was. Of course.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Sagittarius 4° (November 26)

Today is Henry’s birthday so I’ll reach out and post an embarrassing children’s photo. Last night was one of lousy sleep. I woke up like every hour, coughing and/or wheezing. I have to get my act in gear today. As suspected the stupid car window people didn’t come in the, forgiving the pun, window they said they would. So waiting around for nothing all day. It is so annoying. I do want to hear from the agent but at the same time I have to let that expectation go. I’m giving myself certain antcipation agita and (I know from experience) it could end in tears. If there isn’t a book there isn’t a book. I have been waiting all day for the stupid window repair guy to not show up. Was supposed to be here from eight till noon and now it is past four o’clock in the afternoon. I’m really over it I must be honest. I woke up feeling pretty coldy which, knowing me, will pass, without my actually getting ill. But I do feel quite on the verge I must be honest. I know why of course—exposure to smoke always makes me feel this way. Even a very working fieplace can cause me to manifest a cough or worse. I’m so tired of the stressing and of not getting anywhere fast. Oh well, the window guy is finally here and the water is draining perfectly from my sunroof so that’s good news. He is going to replace my windshield (again) but leave the gasket and seal with some urethane. Isn’t this interesting?

I watched the rest of the Grégory documentary on NetFlix when I woke at four this morning because it had subtitles and wouldn’t bother anyone. Then I watched doc of Wynn Handman whom I had never heard of, but that is more a show of my ignorance than anything else. I got to feeling low about having given up on certain dreams; and the weird synchronicities I suffered like starting a poetry and performance night in 1992 or thereabouts at the Bell Caffe and not being able to reach Dael Oerlandersmith who showed up to perform when the project got scrapped. Of course she went on to do great things. I can’t even remember how it is I got the word out back in the day; but I do know that performers contacted me. I was always feeling bad about myself back in those days. (Have things changed all that much.) I have felt disposable as a friend, and seem to relive that trauma over and over. I try to think back on certain times when I felt really solid. I do  know that just prior to moving (back) to NYC (area) in 1987 I wasn’t really concerned with other people in any kind of major way. I was reading the Vedas and the Upanishads and Creative Visualization and was on quite the New Age trip which has now become Now Age. I suppose we can now draw a line from that in such a way that validates my current existence. Although watching that doc on Wynn Handman definitely triggered me and the fact that I didn’t stick on my acting path. I know it’s not too late and I do plan on doing something about it in the coming years (gods willing) and even tying it into something of a book idea. I think the last time I was on Broadway I was twenty nine. I think that makes sense. So maybe I will do something about that at my thirty year anniversary of paying dues to Actors Equity but never quite working as an actor. I don’t believe I took the “wrong” path because there was nobody giving me much support; and pretty much everyone I know who has made it as an actor is either an offspring or never had to work a day in their life on anything but. So that is the long and short of it and I’m certainly not going to feel bad. If Tony Goldwyn couldn’t make it as an actor in the business there would have been something very wrong with him—for instance.

I was trying to piece together my calendar today but frankly I’m just not feeling all that up to snuff. I have a bunch of coldy symptoms which (as they usually do) should pass through me fairly quickly. I must resist the urge to cushion my brain in any way and, the first line of dietary defense, is my instituting some intermittent fasting which is what I did naturally when I was younger. When I look back to my late teens, early twenties, I think that I was something of a manorexic without knowing it. I remember, living in Paris, in 1985, I would go for long stretches without eating and would just order regular old tea with lemon to fill up my stomach. I realize now that I was following some instinct to work against (what has turned out to be) a genetic disposition to be a total fatty. Look I haven’t given myself a lot of time, now, leading up to my departure, twenty-eight days from now. But that is four solid weeks so that is something. I just got lost in social media what a total joke it all is. How does one reclaim there life in this day and age. Everybody is so concerned with being more amazing than the next person. I cannot wait to get out of this emotional wasteland for awhile. I don’t know how much attention people truly need. I just want to focus on giving people guidance and solace and a little bit of laughter in this life. The same people online praising the same other people in this endless chimerac swirl of nothingness. I will hope in vain to hear back today on the subject of books and my night will go too late dealing with repair people. I will be nearly too ill to eat but will manage to get through and then get into bed early with my afflictions.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Sagittarius 3° (November 25)

So okay. Yesterday was pretty functional, as I caught up with all my writing and managed to make some major mental inroads, getting my brain around all that is to come. I have a few major marks to hit today like posting my grant and getting a handle on the mechanic. I did some housecleaning and went to the dump like a dutiful suburbanite and now I need to finish up yesterday’s work about the A.R.T. notes:

Molly Pope was our first ever performer in the series in 2016 and we should be looking at the same kind of appeal as Tori Scott offers to audiences. Molly is more a thinker than Tori and less the party girl archetype; in fact she gets pretty deep into her own struggles with mental health so there is always a profound aspect to a Molly show. This one is especially crafted and she has been working with various arts centers like the Kimmel Center in Philadelphia; and she has worked as an actress with the Atlantic Theater Company, The Eugene O’Neill Theater Center. She has won both the Bistro award and the MAC award for her cabaret work. I think it’s good that this show follows Migguel because I feel we can get a good return (same) crowd as Molly, too, is rather fetishized in NYC by a well-heeled crowd that will see her uptown at Feinsteins or downtown at Joe’s Pub. I’m wonder if, given proper lead time, if we couldn’t get Boston Magazine to do something on her as she has many glam looks and press photos. Also the Niche Media folks might be interested. This is probably the most showbiz show we are doing (on the surface) but Molly always brings an absurdist, intellectual slant to everything she creates.

I mean what I say but I have to start saying what I mean, maybe? I will let this whole thing ride with Cambridge and let them know sooner than later that I will be dehors!

I want to meet fabulous and creative people whilst in Paris. That is surely one of my goals. I am over feeling sneaky I must say. Tomorrow is the new moon and I’m looking very much forward to putting some new plans and mindsets into action. I must be patient with myself in the process. Man oh man I can’t tell you what is going on in my head right now. It’s one of those one step forward two step back days. I wrote to Peter Davis but haven’t heard back. I really need to simplify my existence here. We have yet to sit down and figure out what’s what. I can’t seem to make the kind of progress I want and need to make but I’m going to continue chipping away and do my best. I need a clear head for the next month or so. That would be a non-negotiable. I really don’t like the way I feel for starters and I need more pep in my step; and to figure out what the fuck I’m going to do. I know it all starts with my physical self and I am prepared to do what it takes on that score to make some quick fixes to my routine. Was thinking when I get to London too I can take a few classes. You know what, once again I’m just feeling like I’m losing the battle along with the plot. I hopped in the car and got some Chinon and I made a sort of chicken cashew that was pretty delish. I passed out pretty early and apparently was talking in my sleep about body language and how we used to be able to read it but no longer can.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Sagittarius 2° (November 24)

I have a tickle in my throat. And my memory feels pretty dodgy. Trying to feel good and not guilty. I don’t know why I have this scared rabbit feeling today. I think I need to get out of the way of my own emotions and just let the pass or float through and over them. I always feel like I fucked things up. No surprise that would be my default feeling since it kind of is, due to its imposition on me. I mean the family lore was that everything got ruined when I showed up. I ruined my sister’s and father’s lives. Tomorrow will be a very fun, working day. I will prepare for the window guy etc. My sense is that no water is coming in that way but I could be wrong. Even there I feel guilty for having brought folk’s attention to it. This falls under the larger heading of certain grooves in behavior of which I feel ready to let go. All is the chasing of a feeling, but we know that money doesn’t bring said feeling about. Some of the richest people I know struggle with anxiety and depression. I think most would agree that it makes emotional matters worse not better. Eighteen days until the Kennedy shindig and I hope to at least rid myself of some lbs. off the top. I began intermittent fasting today. Let’s see what happens on that score shall we? I spent most of the day catching up on this, which has been very helpful to my mind set. And I’m ready to start slotting a lot of things into place. I mentioned having phone conference with ART folks the other day. Now I need to put together some minutes and say something along the lines of:

It was nice speaking with you last week and good to brainstorm on the coming shows for winter/spring 2020, especially in positioning approach to the artists, whose work all have their distinctive personalities, promotional hooks and demographics. You had mentioned wanting more information on the artists than appears on the FB event pages et al in any case. As is always helpful, I would love to get individual press releases for all the remaining four shows.

Kareem M. Lucas is distinguished as one of the great, new theatrical hopes coming out of New York.  He is an actor, playwright, poet, producer and director. Early in 2019 he performed the show he is doing at Oberon at the Cherry Lane’s Theater Mentor Program, which is an Obie-award-winning new play series. Kareem was mentored by Craig “muMs” Grant. He is also a 2019/20 Jerome Hill Artist Fellow recepient. And he was awarded a 2019/20 playwright residency at the New York Theater Workshop. So it’s all very happening for him right now; and we might think about contacting more of the theatrical trade publications as well as reaching out to African American community leaders, press and journalists who might champion his work which directly points to race and social justice. Also can we think about his giving some kind of talk for theater department at Harvard/ART (which is something which I feel could apply to all our artists who have in the past been poached by Tufts/Museum School et al. Though not a comedian per se, I do feel that this show would also be the beat of Nick Zaino and more muscular journalist and social media figures. I do think Kareem is destined to make a mark and from a curatorial perspective we are spot-on in presenting him; that said, we should enjoy some financial as well as artistic reward in so doing. I do think that some local NPR and college radio should be a distinct focus here. I will look further into ERS BUR and touch base with Jared Bowen on this. I do think too that we can get some think-pieces, here. I will reach out to Globe because they might be planning something to do with Black History month. We shouldn’t avoid the obvious and do some searches on Boston events to see if we can get some interested generated from any larger, more comprehensive celebrations/events happening at that time.

Penny Arcade, as discussed, can fill houses in New York City with lengthy runs. It does occur that the title of her show might be too NYC-sounding and not universal enough; but there is a Boston demographic who is especially into the downtown New York experience and we need some old-school characters—journalists and figures in the performance scenes, especially, in Somerville and Jamaica Plain who would be attracted to the authenticity of her experience as an underage teen from Bridgport CT who was swept up by a caravan of dragqueens who took her to live in Provincetown in the Summer of Love in the 1960s, where she secretly lived in Prescott Townsend’s house without him knowing, before landing in New York where she became part of Andy Warhol’s Factory. Being then a youngster among these painters, performers, filmmakers and activists, she is one of the only surviving figures from that seminal era and is the doyenne of downtown New York performance. We really should dig deep into the Queer community with this show. And (as I have done with some shows in the past) I especially want to reach out to the NYC community to activate them in contacting their Boston cronies and colleagues. Penny is a performer who has benifited greatly from Afterglow in that, prior to her involvement in 2011, she wasn’t in the same loop as the younger NYC performers who performed Joe’s Pub and other places. We surely had a hand in recontextualizing Penny and presenting her to a new generation of audience and artists who do hail her as the Queen of performance.

Migguel Anggelo will have the easiest time selling his show because, as mentioned, he seems to have a lot of promotional support behind him. His manager (and perhaps partner— I’ve never asked) David Stark is a super connected designer and event planner in NYC and part of the “gay mafia” based there. This would contribute to explaining a newcomer like Migguel getting the kind of press, and celebrity audience selfies, he enjoys. I will reach out as best I can to the “Boston/Ptown chapter” and see if I can get interest from some folks like Bryan Rafanelli, Daniel Mullins, John Ruggieri, Adam Cutone and other fancy pants. At the same time, I will dig into the LatinX community and culling of contacts I have done in the past in promoting Marga Gomez in the past.

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Sagittarius 1° (November 23)

Okay so I’m talking about Thursday morning in this Saturday slot which means I’m truly catching up to myself here. And Saturday will be the most uneventful day of this week because I’ll just end up watching the Crown all day (having awoken at 12:46 early Saturday morning and not getting back to sleep at all until Saturday evening) which is totally justified. I’m also fighting fear and loathing underneath it all which I won’t realize until tomorrow. But, right, let’s go back to Thursday and hopefully end this Blague entry completely up to date. Right so it’s still all about the hearings. And today is Holmes and Hill and it will feel amazing to hear them both advocating for truth while the day will end with Schiff’s gavel and then, already, all the weirdness will creep in. I had a morning meeting with ART and then we headed into Cambridge to Hi Rise where we met Machine Dazzle for a little brunch action and then to Mount Auburn where everything was kosher except I somehow, from lobby to car, lost the parking ticket that lets me out of the lot. But we got on our way and smooth sailed down Memorial Drive across the Mass Ave Bridge down Marlborough and over Clarendon to the cleaners before heading to the South End for a mini moveable feast we can bring home from Formaggio. We got cheese and pasta and all sorts of yummy things like barnyard grapes and we hit traffic getting onto 93 but worked the HOV lane and listened to the end of the hearings. We unpacked quickly with wine and then watched the Crown which I like way more than S. does. Of the two of us, I would be the more tolerant of the monarchy.

On Friday I did try the mechanics but he wasn’t in and I got caught up in other things; I was trying to remember what I’d call it. I mean I did my morning mystics and marketing and I was chatting on FB with this guy—how do you get some of the friends you do on social media?—he had been in the army and he made some comment on some comment of mine that I put on someone’s (can’t remember whose now) thread. I spoke too to the Safelite people and will call again tomorrow. I cleaned the entire house which really needed it; unpacked. and I got all my papers where they needed to be. And I was writing my Blague when my screen froze, which I’ve mentioned, but here I am back again to today and it is really happening. It was one of those laptop reboots when a hundred word documents open, collating one behind the other. But weirdly it wasn’t all different documents but my one same document in duplicate times a hundred. Anyway I thought I copied and pasted the correct “recovered” one but apparently not or otherwise I did and the laptop recovery didn’t happen. Whatever the case, it was one of the bummers of this day, but not one I discovered until rather late in the day. S. had gone to VW and WF and we were to have salmon for dinner. I find it so weird Venice is flooding so much just as we are planning to finally go there on our “honeymoon.” Good lord. Wow and we really haven’t known each other for so long—that should make it more unclearer. I’m not doing that bad right now really; I think I’m moving things along pretty well actually.

We have a chat with Meg on the books for today (Friday) as we receive one pass from a publisher and what should be an offer. We also have a client whom we see at our shared pleasure. It is nice to be able to give some time in this regard. And then we will sit by the fire and start slotting things into a schedule. I have been keeping a list of things at the end of this document I’m currently writing in—always two months worth of Blague together—that need to get slotted into my schedule; but when I go to look at the list I not only notice that it isn’t as complete as I had made it, but also that a few days Blagues have disappeared. This is the event to which I’ve alluded, which explains why all my tenses–past, present and future—have been swirling around these last several days’ entries. I am zeroing in on Bikram, and I will end up starting the documentary about him today. I did binge the entire Crown, in the end and thought it was fabulous in many ways but sort of alienating in others. I loved the episodes with the deaf nun Princess Alice. And I think Tobias Menzies brings in the best performance over all. Nina beamed in to prompt me to get in the VSB application and I notice that my grant money from MCC has hit my account which is a good thing since I spent a bloody fortune this past month. But that’s another thing I have to contend with. I will put together my list for ART and I have on the docket for tomorrow to think about what would have constituted minutes of that chat. I’m not a big fan of American but I know that community theaters must peddle in it. Oh right so we saw Machine Dazzle and he is being repped by people so I don’t know how to tell him that what we are offering isn’t a whole helluva lot. I’m curious to see what’s up with Morgan B. as well. I will go down the list and I will wish everybody well. I think the larger thought I was having was about lucrativity—actually the word is lucrativeness, if you can believe it. Maybe I should write a book called Lucr(e)ativity. Then again maybe I should just try to get this book deal that is currently on the table. Ha!

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox

Sagittarius 0° (November 22)

I totally forgot to say that Yvan wrote back the same day and I hope we shall see him in Paris. We don’t have much of a set-up there for serving meals—although I intend to change that! This is meant to be Friday’s post. I am writing it on Sunday, but the subject of what I’m writing begins on the previous Wednesday and, by the time it’s done, I hope at least to be caught up through Thursday. So I got those early morning Americanos downstairs and brought them up so we can pack. My stomach feels markedly better and I credit my martini instinct of last night. We descended for brekkie with A. and I had the weird board with whipped ricotta, hardboiled eggs and sweet potato and kale. Strange combination truly. Then I had a chicken sausage. I want to remain full today as we are hopping a train. A. had what she had yesterday plus some taters and she loved the present be brought here. Now remember the day before we had this full on discussion about the person who introduced us and how we empowered A. to stand up for her and vice versa really; and also how the person who works for that culprit in London confided that we are all blameless and that V.D. is insidious to say the least. And penny wise pound foolish, we would have been so happy to have given to and remained open to working with her; but to be shaken down by someone in this culture of shakedown is just that much more an affront and so not on. Yvan’s screenwriting partner was seated at a booth herself, no sign of him today. We went over a major timeline for the jewelry and it felt very forward moving on that score. So it was time to get on the road. We walked through the lounge and to the front door of the hotel and A. asked where the ladies was and we explained she should go back through the lounge the way she came. We hugged and elevatored to the room to grab our bangs and go. In those few minutes A. had written that V.D. was actually in the lounge! Can you believe this particular synchronicity? I mean, it’s been quite a week. And we had J.D. and now V.D. and we got loached by the editor and my stomach hurts and the whole thing is feeling very depressing suddenly but I’m going to sail through that feeling. We grabbed our bags and checked out and managed to avoid her which felt like an accomplishment in itself.

Got to the train station with some time to spare. There was this Amish or I’m going to say even more strict sect Mennonite family that looked so super odd and inbred with the tiniest faces you’ve even seen and really small feet, all in black with bonnets and suitcases without wheels. Come to find out later when we get to Reading that there is quite a large community upstate, which I find terribly interesting. Our train was called at Standby and we did see some folks gathering in one area and it turned out they had information we didn’t have. Still we queued up in time not to be in a crush of people heading down to the train platform and we did find seats across the aisle from each other in the quiet car and I sat down and wrote a great deal of texts that would have made up the entries for November nineteen, twenty and twenty-one. And I have now caught up, by way of circular conversation to the day before the day of this date. Phew. So I was sitting next to this kind of dry, funny guy who wanted to connect, briefly, which was cool. We had some emails from our agent, also forwarding us a note from the would-be editor who came to the same conclusion we had. The person who was the problem at Harper didn’t even work there when we were publishing our book under that aegis. She also asked if she could approach a first pass list. There were two people on it from the old days and I said we were kind of spooked. She wrote right back to say that she already had enthusiastic verbal feedback that they did want to see our proposal. So things are starting to feel a little healed on the publishing front and perhaps we are not in some kind of pergatory after all.

We got to 128 and it was already very dark and raining and there would be traffic, but not as bad as I thought and so we listened to the hearings and headed to Reading to grab some La Stoppa and Pellegrino (and I was given a little fig dip for helping the staff with something). We got to N.’s and I think they might have been waiting for us a bit but it was super casual and we had some broccoli soup with cheese and salad and had a fairly calm talk. If anything I talked too much recapping what went down. I was talking about the effects of my new direction with medical treatment and the like. We are planning to see our doctors in Cambridge the next day which is one of the best places one can see doctors. In this way I feel very at home in this part of the world. I would have to be ill in New York City or need a hospital there. It really is most surely unglam. So Wednesday ends and we manage to sleep enough and thankfull I get another bath before leaving and I’m feeling very relaxed indeed. The debates were on but seem so beside the fact now. And tomorrow will be the final day of these hearings (for now).

To view the original Sabian Symbol themed 2015 Cosmic Blague corresponding to this day: Flashback! The degree pointof the Sabian Symbol will be one degree higher than the one listed for today. The Blague portrays the starting degree of for this day ( 0°,  for instance), as I typically post in the morning, while the Sabian number corresponds to the end point (1°) of that same 0°-1° period. There are 360  degrees spread over 365 or 6 days per year—so they near but not exactly correlate.

Typos happen. I don’t have a proofreader. And I like to just write, post and go!
Copyright 2019 Wheel Atelier Inc. All Rights Reserved.
Get your HAUTE ASTROLOGY 2019 Weekly Horoscope ebooks by Starsky + Cox